Don’t Mess With Mom

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Don’t Mess With Mom

So, I was writing my welcome page today and thinking about springtime. The Sea Archer, coming out in the fall, is about the descendants of Apollo, Poseidon, and Demeter. Many people know the story of Demeter albeit through Persephone and Hades but if not here’s one simplified version.

Demeter, the goddess of agriculture, harvest, fertility and sacred law, is also the goddess of the seasons we enjoy in a sense. Though not one of the more well-known gods, she’s kind of a big deal, in one sense, in mythology. Her story is one of the great mother-daughter relationships.

Zeus and Demeter hooked up, which is a little gross considering they’re siblings. One can argue that there weren’t many folks around then and the population had to start somewhere but I digress. After becoming pregnant with Persephone and giving birth, Demeter wanted to keep her daughter pure through all the rape and pillaging going on at Mt. Olympus. She moved her very far away but as the girl grew she became a hottie. Demeter rejected the gifts of many men and gods alike, who wanted Persephone all for their own. Well, of course in the way of all men, once something is off-limits, they tend to seek it out even more fervently.

Hades, needing a break from hanging out with all the weird, floaty, dead people, left the Underground for the day. He heard laughter and singing nearby. As he approached, he noticed Persephone with Artemis and Athena, the cool aunties who were also virgins. He fell instantly in love with the girl and basically stalked her. After watching the woman’s mother reject both Apollo and Hermes from courting Persephone, Hades had an idea and went to Zeus, saying he wanted to abduct her. Zeus, wanting to unload his daughter and being the good brother he was, decided, eh why not. Poor Hades got the shit detail, while I float around on a cloud, why not let him have his entertainment. So he allowed him to do it.

When the lovely woman was picking flowers being all ethereal, Hades surged out of the Underworld through a crack in the earth and snatched her. Persephone screamed so loud her mom heard it and ran to find her but couldn’t. Demeter searched everywhere, growing more and more freaked out, which caused her to become remiss on her duties of growing food. The once plentiful resources began to diminish a little with her worry and distraction.

She decided the best thing to do was go to Helios since he’s so high in the sky, thinking he could “shed some light,” (pardon the pun) on the situation. Well, of course, Helios told her what happened and Demeter became beyond pissed, and bitch slapped Zeus in a way, only a jilted ex-lover can. When he wouldn’t budge she said, screw it, and decided to stop the life-sustaining food. As the cries and pleas of the starving people reached Zeus, he realized she called his bluff and called for all the parties involved.

Zeus held court and told Hades he’d screwed up and fun was fun but now he’d have to return Demeter’s daughter to her. Hades looked at the older goddess and smiled saying he’d be happy to but his wife got hungry and ate some pomegranate seeds in the Underworld which apparently is some trippy stuff because now she can’t leave. Zeus seeing Demeter’s anger begin to percolate again told Hades that it’s true Persephone was bound to the Underworld but only for four months. Zeus looked at Demeter and said for another four months she’ll get to hang out with you, though why she’d want to was a mystery to him. Finally, he looked at Persephone and decided maybe she should have a say in her life too, so gave her the last four months to decide where she wanted to go.

The parties all agreed and though Persephone stayed with her mother for half the time and Hades the other half, after a while she grew to love her husband and spent most of her time hanging with him in the Underworld. As for Demeter, she all but lost her beloved daughter, so decided when it came time for her daughter to leave her, Demeter would make it so things didn’t grow. It began with Fall/Autumn and what she called the “little death.” Afterward, she probably became more pissed she was robbed and decided to show that displeasure by saying Winter and just for good measure throw a blanket of snow on everything to make it really impossible. When she anticipated her daughter’s return she grew more excited causing Spring and finally the abundance of Summer.

So, long story short mother and daughter are about to be reunited, GIRL POWER!!


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